I am a yoga teacher and handstands scare me. Early this year I set a goal to conquer this pose within 3 months. I failed! I got completely caught up in the result. I was ruled by fear and that which I couldn't do. I hated the pose and avoided it at all costs.
A few weeks ago I changed my perspective. Instead of focusing on getting my hips and legs over my shoulders, I focused on staying grounded through my hands every time they made contact with the floor. I softened my shoulders. I ensured my core was engaged. I connected fully with the power of my breath. I approached the pose with a calm assertive energy. I detached from the outcome and started to enjoy the process. My own strength surprised me when I took the time to acknowledge what I could do rather than what I couldn't. Now I can hover, fingertips gripping the floor, for a few seconds. And I am happy with that. Will I ever comfortably stand on my hands for a few minutes? Maybe not but it doesn't really matter any more.
If there is something you feel you need to conquer in life - relationships, career, weight, anything at all - consider setting an intention rather than a goal. Apply that positive intention equally to all parts of your life. There is nothing wrong with being ambitious and driven but measuring the value of your life and ultimately your happiness based solely on outcome is setting yourself up for a fall. If you don't reach the goal, you have failed. If you do, what next? The cycle starts all over again. Set an intention, empower yourself and enjoy the journey.